Thursday, November 4, 2010

Conundrum...

I really, really want to learn how people “live in the present.” I feel like I’m stuck in a doldrum because I am constantly looking backwards or forwards. Worrying and wondering. Just thinking… about everything, always. I’ve got to analyze all the possible outcomes and if there is a really negative one, I think it’s not worth it, even if it’s more likely for a positive or happy ending. I have these aspirations to be happier and enjoy life more, but it doesn’t seem to come very natural so I’m stuck wondering (again) how people do it. Does it come natural to them or are they faking it till they make it. If it’s the latter, how do they do it?!?!? How do they force themselves into what’s most likely uncomfortable situations in order to “live and learn.” How do they stop themselves from thinking too much, or do they just ignore their subconscious and do it anyway?

These are the things I want to know. Because as my previous post mentioned (and even more before that) there are a ton of things that I want to do. That just need to be “done” but I haven’t even begun to get things aligned in order to mark things off…

Blarg… it’s Thursday so the week’s almost over. Maybe this weekend I can do something fabulous and exciting. Maybe someone should hold me too it. (And I know that someone should be myself, but obviously that’s too hard…)

I’m gonna work on my Christmas List for the family now because they are all over me about it… Thanks for listening to me.

2 comments:

  1. I think living in the now is somewhat over rated... There needs to be a balance. One needs to know where they have come from (the past) and know where they want to go (the future) if they plan on living in the present. SO you do need to analyze things because if you just wing it, it may hurt your overall plan... but if you over analyze which is what I think you sometimes do you never do anything different. I think it is important to have what the world labels as "failures" in life so that we grow. If you never take a risk, you never learn what you are made of. Its hard... but overall you come back to the fact that no matter what choice you make, no matter how it turns out your family (and those who feel like family) will love and support you regardless of the outcome. :)

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  2. Hey so I think that really what you need to do is just feel like you've done something with your day. I mean, you may not have ridden a cowboy #willnotletitgo but you can say "alright, i've cleaned the bathroom and took an impromtu trip to target" you have to mix the "have to's" with the "want to's". Maybe the week can be getting prepared for the "living in the now" weekend? PLUS living in the now makes it sound like we wont have criminal minds and I WILL NOT STAND FOR THAT. jkjk

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